Joys of the past

An amazing thing happened today.

I drove my ‘Sunny Zip’ today.

For those of you who are unfamiliar with this vehicle – the Bajaj Sunny was India’ first scooterette. It has a 60cc engine, which takes it to a maximum speed of 50kph, and it weighs around 60 kgs. In 1996, my father bought this Sunny Zip for me when I topped my 6th standard final exams in Jalandhar Army School. I was, to say the least, ecstatic when I got my Sunny. I the youngest kid in the entire neighborhood to boast of a vehicle that you didn’t have to pedal around, and that translated into instant stardom among my 12-year old peers. Suddenly, everyone in school knew me and wanted to be a friend. Kids would beg for a ride, sometimes even dare to ask if they could get a test ride. Good ol’ days!

However, like all new and shiny things, I soon decided that the Sunny Zip I had treasured for so many years was no longer a suitable ride for me. I had grown up to be an adamant teenager (to be fair, I was a pretty adamant kid too!) and I needed a bigger and cooler ride. Yet today, after almost 10 years of declaring that I no longer needed this tiny scooty, I was surprisingly happy to drive it today. My father is especially attached to the Sunny since it was my first ride and he was quite proud that I managed to drive it around on my first attempt. I owe all my driving skills to him and this was my first step. Hence he has doggedly ignored all our attempts to convince him to sell off the vehicle.

I admit that I didn’t understand why he couldn’t give up this article that had no use left. But maybe I get it a little bit today. When I got back home after the drive, I was wondering how many happy memories from my past have I just forgotten about. Maybe I was just moving on, to better things and memories, but I guess that doesn’t require me to forget all that was good about the past. I have endlessly complained and stressed about all that didn’t work out, and I think today gives me a good reason to stop doing that. Here’s to an awesome future and big thanks for the past. It’s been good!

The theory of relativity

A long time back, an intelligent man put forth a brilliant comparison for explaining a theory of physics using a analogy that went on to become one of the most popular statements in theoretical physics. The well-known line states “Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. THAT'S relativity.”.
This simple analogy for explaining relativity got me thinking about how we tend to perceive our crises in life. I have often talked to my friends about “tragedies” in our lives – getting passed over for a promotion, breaking up with our boyfriends/girlfriends, getting frustrated with our bosses/co-workers, and so on. In the totality of our lives, the incident takes immense importance, and we constantly talk and crib about it. It’s the only thing that matters. We not only need to expresses our opinion about the situation but also ensure we collect the advice of all those we come in contact with. And no matter what, nothing, absolutely nothing, alleviates our pain.
Three weeks back, I was in a bad mood. Something was wrong with the way things were in life. And I was upset. In accordance with my traditional behavior, I was in a foul mood. However, one day, while coming back home from work, I stopped to meet a good friend. As is the case with most good friends, he could instantly sense my terrible mood, and insisted I share what was bugging me. I poured my mind out with one of my famous non-stop rambles. He heard me out, half-smiled, and said, “Did you know that my aunt lost her husband to a snake-bite, then lost her eldest daughter to brain hemorrhage, her son to cancer and then her youngest daughter to a heart attack?” I didn’t quite know what to say. I didn’t see any point of why she would want to live on. That must so totally suck. I went back home that night thinking of all the tragic stories I had heard over the years- and I had heard quite a few- and I realized that the magnitude of whatever was wrong in my life definitely did not trump the misfortune so many had faced.
Relatively, life isn’t that bad. I have parents who are healthy, a good job, some terrific friends and 27 years of awesome experiences behind me. I might not have achieved everything that I put down in my “master plan” for life, but every deviation and detour resulted in a lesson that I treasure. I met some amazing people, and each one of them taught me something unique.
So, I don’t care if something is screwed up right now, I am sure it will get better. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it!

The affair of a lifetime

Brought up in a conservative Indian family, I was told that marriage is one of the most sacred things one could commit to. For most part of my life (I'm not that old yet!) I was also made to believe that "arranged" marriages were the ones that stood the test of time, led to more obedient kids and a lifetime of assurance that your spouse would always be there for you.
However, no sooner than the end of my adolescent years, I discovered that I was more in support of "love" marriages. It sounded like much more fun to not have to pretend to be someone else for the sake of your spouse-to-be... guys pretending they don't smoke and drink, girls pretending to be shy and coy virgins, the list is long and surprisingly creative. A love marriage also gave one the feeling of having made an independent decision about selecting one's life partner. It was in and very very cool.
Alternatively, everything about arranged marriages seemed dull and boring. Meeting random strangers at the insistence of your parents, trying to strike interesting conversations, wondering how weird the guy/girl actually is in real-life, and the endless trepidation the follows you around.
I do not wish to take sides now, having seen a bit of life myself. But as I look back on the many happy marriages I know of, I see fair bit of pull in favor of arranged marriages. True, it had a head start, for I know of very few couples from the generations before us who ventured into love marriages. Irrespective of how the tale is told, lucky are those who find the quintessential 'happy married life'.

Spreading joy

I'm easily amused. By clumsy actions, wise cracks, funny limericks, humorous stories... in short, I'm easily amused. It doesn't take a lot of effort to make me laugh. An easy, yet incorrect, conclusion to the fact mentioned above might be that I'm not blessed with an amazing sense of humour. The correct, though slightly difficult to fathom, reason is that I'm extremely well-mannered. (I can imagine a few ROFL's after this) But it's so true! When somebody cracks a joke, even the ones that don't really tickle my funny bone, I am quite capable of mustering a decently safe bout of laughter.
However, again...before you assume that most of my friends are not really funny, stop!!! Because they truly are. Some can crack me up with oft-repeated lines, some with their weird expressions and weirder lingos. In fact, I think the stranger the person, the funnier he/she gets.
It's not uncommon for me to be grinning while I think about someone or something that happened to me long before. I believe funny stories are like good memories; you should remember them fondly ever once in a while, and share them with as many people as you can. So spread the joy, but stop if your audience looks really pained. ;-)

I do like to...

As days go by, I get this feeling that I do not really know what I want to do. There are fleeting moments when I think I do, but then these moments pass, and I'm back to square one.
This blog stems from a conversation that started on my way back from Amby Valley, with 2 of my friends. I was, as always, dishing out some 'gyaan' (yes I know I like to do that!), in response to the endless cribbing that was going on. But I realized that they had a very valid argument for their complaints. How do you decide what you want to do in your life when u don't know what it is that you want to do? I'm sure I've screwed up that line and confused everyone, but that's how I tend to think. Anyway, that got me thinking... I'm sure I want to do certain things that I've always planned for...like do an MBA, start something of my own, build a nice house with loads of wood and a pool(sigh!)... but how the heck will all this happen? I take one look at the essay questions and I feel like I have no words in my kitty left (I know some of you are laughing now, but these are serious issues!) The economy is royally messed up, there are no scholarships left (not that B-schools were being extremely charitable before) and somehow I'm just getting poorer by the day.
Well, I can only conclude that nothing is going to happen if I don't do something. Whether it is taking a decision about what I want to do versus what I should do, or even figuring out what I really, really want... "DOING" is the key.
Back to my musings again...

A bout of nostalgia…

A change of job comes with its upsides and downsides. After my recent switch, I’ve got a decent pay-hike (better than my counterparts … with IT raises hitting rock-bottom this year), decent work-hours (yea, I know its because I’m still ‘new’ and nobody can dump work on me that I don’t understand ;-) ),working conditions conducive to productivity, a good boss (I can’t stress enough on that!!) and a good shot at making a decent (read rocking) career for myself. But there are days, some days, but yet there are those days, when I miss my good ol’ company. I don’t shy away from hard-work, but I think there are times I’d like to be one of the ‘hardly-working’ types…Call it nostalgia, but I can’t help missing the free time I had on my hands a few months back (it’s a whole different issue that I didn’t use it much, except to have fun :P ). But now that I’m here, not only do I have work (to do and learn), I also need to get started with my extremely, terribly, long-overdue plan of giving GMAT. Plus, the part I hate most is that I miss my friends. There are nice people here, and everyone keeps telling me that it takes some time to make friends and get comfortable, yet I keep missing ‘my’ friends. I miss the familiar faces, the friendly waves, the small talk with people whose names I keep forgetting, my window-seat, the green gardens and the ‘chai ki tapri’. I bet I could keep going on but I want to stop. It’s a different kind of feeling to be surrounded by people who are competent, know what needs to be done, and do not get off your back till the job is done the right way. I like this feeling of responsibility, which was absent (at least on the work-front) for quite some time now. I can feel my ambitions fledging. It is different but it feels okay.
I guess what I’m trying to say is that change is inevitable, it’s our decision to either get on with it or keep holding on to a more secure past. I’m still in touch with the friends I keep missing all day long, but I don’t feel bad about it anymore. I’m not best friends with anyone in my new company yet, but I’m sure I can survive 10 hours a day with these guys now… But most of all, I look forward to making sure that this change is for the better.

The pursuit of happiness

A sudden discussion with one of my best friends sprouted some thoughts on what one needs to feel satisfied with one's life. I've always had a standard definition for what I want in my life.... I just want to be happy. The problem is, I need a lot of things to make me feel that way. For starters, a good job, one which gets me a fat paycheck every month, along with satisfactory work, good colleagues, a nice boss...and the works. Most people keep telling me that's a lot to ask for! And given my current situation, I have to agree.
The ironic thing is, a few months back, I used to LOVE my work. Excellent work, a supportive boss, friendly co-workers..Its a whole different story now!! Anyway, I think I'm digressing from the point...
So, getting back to being happy. I wish there was a formula for it. Anyway, apart from work, I think good family support and a healthy dose of good friends should do the trick. Seems pretty easy to achieve. I mean, we all have friends, our parents would really never not support us and how difficult is it to find a decent job (especially when you have a solid education backing you up)? Turns out, its not that simple.
I'm still figuring it out for myself. Don't have a lot of concrete answers yet, but I'm happy I've started getting a few things on track.